28 Sep Should grandparents discipline their grandchildren?

Parents are responsible for their children, so, in most cases, you should defer to them, even if their approach differs from yours when it comes to disciplining your grandchildren.  There is always the extra softness that comes with age.  It is simply the grandparent’s right to indulge the whims of their g-children.

Location, Location, Location

Location can and should affect this hierarchy of authority. I firmly believe that each generation has the right to make rules in its own home: for example, where children can eat food, where their diapers can be changed, and how other standards of cleanliness will be upheld. When you visit grandchildren in your children’s homes, the parents’ rules should apply. When kids are visiting you in your home, your rules can take precedence.

An oldie but goodie is the “time out” chair when it is absolutely necessary. If the parents are not present and you are left with the need to take disciplinary action, this is a proven way to take a breath and start over again in a few minutes.

If you have a long distance relationship with your children and grandchildren, it is important to understand that the house rules should remain in place when you visit.  If you cannot tolerate the rules of your child’s house it is important to express your feelings before you arrive.  If you find the rules are too tough to follow stay on neutral ground.  The price of staying at your child’s home is to follow the rules. Keep in mind that if you constantly push against what they believe in you may not get invited again any time soon.

Over the years, parents and grandparents will negotiate ways to coexist with each other for the benefit of the new generation, and eventually our grandchildren will become old enough to add their own opinions to the mix. Won’t that be fun!!

This chair is hand painted by Janice in Wonderland in Montreal